As I sit to write this I hear the word HONESTY ringing in my head. I have always valued honesty. I have always felt I am an honest person and expect others to be honest with me. I guess that is why I appreciate it when someone comes directly to me to discuss differences, or just ask for honest answers.
Recently that happened, a dear friend who has known me for a great many years asked me to come and talk. I was apprehensive when I sat down, but within a few short minutes I was feeling better. We talked about years past; the struggles we had been through. The encouragement each have given to the other over the years. We spoke of feelings of loss and abandonment, of learning how to protect ones self by keeping others at a distance. It was a time of clarity and also the reopening of painful memories. It always amazes me how much of our lives is shared with others, especially good friends.
I was reminded today of what it is to be responsible to others, not just ones self. What it is to feel called to a purpose and how one can lose sight of that. I struggled to explain my decisions. I know what I feel, I know to whom I have given my heart and I must now reconcile my life with that choice.
I will always struggle to do what is right, and follow my heart.
